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It can be a mix of excitement, relief, and worry. Many children may try to suppress these feelings to meet societal expectations, to fit in, or even to avoid upsetting their parents or families. In some cases, teens might be overwhelmed by all these feelings, which increases the risk for depression , anxiety, and other mental health issues.
For example, they may isolate themselves from others for fear of being exposed, or "outed. Teens may accept that they are LGBT but not yet ready to start sharing this information with anyone yet. Some will feel comfortable being open about their identity, while other teens may not tell anyone for a long time. Teens may look for clues on how you feel about their gender identity and sexual orientation. Speaking positively about LGBT celebrities or current events you will let them know you are supportive of their identity.
Society has become more open and accepting of LGBT individuals, and young people are beginning to come out at earlier ages than they did a generation ago. Children may first come out to online communities or peers they perceive as safe and accepting before telling their family. Teens feel secure enough in who they are and share that information with loved ones. It takes courage and strength for a young person to share who they are inside, especially for teens who are unsure of how their families will respond.
They may be afraid of disappointing or angering their families, or in some instances may fear being physically harmed or thrown out of their homes. Again, parents usually need time to deal with the news. While it may take them days, weeks or many months to come to terms with their child's sexuality or gender identity, it is important for parents to show love and support for their child, even if they don't fully understand everything.
Coming out to others can be a liberating experience, especially for those teens who are embraced by their communities and families. LGBT teens may feel free to speak openly about their feelings and possibly romantic relationships for the first time. For transgender and gender diverse teens, they may finally feel free to begin expressing themselves genuinely as the gender they feel inside.
When your child discloses his or her identity to you, respond in an affirming, supportive way. Understand that although gender identity is not able to be changed, it often is revealed over time as people discover more about themselves. Accept and love your child as they are. Try to understand what they are feeling and experiencing.
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