Honestly, it was a pretty funny encounter. When I started to tell him, he said it would be better if I got in the car and showed him, and then he winked at me. I went to the NYC gay pride parade once. Terrible idea. Until a guy started rubbing his crotch on me five minutes later. I am straight and had never been hit on by gay dudes before but when I started that job it became normal for me. They would be cool, perverted, nice, douchey, or whatever at every event I worked. It definitely made me feel bad for anyone that goes through that. The main demographic is year-old gay men.
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I find it horrible. Fucking disgusting. During most of the week it was a gay club but on Wednesday nights it was open to everyone 18 and over. Now in PA you could have serve alcohol and have underage patrons in the same space, but they had to be separated by a fence. While my wife was out dancing I was behind the fence with dozens of gay guys just sitting back and relaxing. Nobody hit on me for the first few weeks we went. Then it happened.
He started up a conversation. Got me a drink. Found out I was married and walked away. So my conclusion is that I may not play for the team, but I appreciate the compliment.
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Shout out to the straight people who genuinely feel that way. As a kid, I was extremely skinny and liked video games and other nerd shit.
I guess that automatic response kind of stuck with me. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. You may unsubscribe at any time. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement. More From Thought Catalog.
Sometimes, when I don't have anything important to do, I write. Read more articles from Lorenzo on Thought Catalog. Get our newsletter every Friday! You're in!
9 Struggles Of Being A Lesbian I Wish Someone Warned Me About
Follow Thought Catalog. It all comes down to anatomy. As Dr. Goldstein told me, stool resides in the sigmoid colon, the part of the large intestine closest to the rectum and anus. There, you'll find a muscle that keeps poo from going into the rectum and through the anus until you're actually ready to, you know, poo.
That means there shouldn't be any stool where the top's dick is going, unless your top is hung like Jon Hamm times Justin Theroux. You're probably about to say, "Yeah, but when I douche all kinds of poo comes out. The thing about enemas and irrigation devices is that they were made for people with actual constipation issues, not bottoms. When we douche, the force of water propelled into the colon goes past the area that actually needs to be clean for sex, up into the sigmoid colon.
That fills the feces up there with water, and then washes it all out, which is the point of the enema in the first place. An enema cleans out way more than you need to for sex, making your butthole even dirtier in the process. And many people do this repeatedly, until the water comes out clear.
Gay dating always dirty — StartNow
That's like draining a whole pool just to get a few leaves out when you could be using a skimmer instead. Though it's possible for a dick to enter the sigmoid colon depending on one's individual anatomy, it's not common. The doctors added that over-the-counter enemas weren't intended to be used on a regular basis, either.
Goldstein said. The chemical in there creates irritation. It brings water into the movement so you can poop away, but it causes the cells [of the rectum] to get irritated.
It creates tons of mucus and tons of dryness in the area. Goldstone points out that douching too often can lead to other, long-lasting problems, too. You can lengthen your colon, and that can lead to constipation later in life," he said. Yep, your worst fears are true: Goldstone said symptoms of that damage aren't often evident until it's too late. What should you do instead? Well, probably nothing. Both doctors recommended a simple shower before bottoming, using plain water to clean the butthole and a little bit inside, too.
If that's not sufficient, there's probably something wrong with your diet. Try adding fiber for bulkier stools, which can be found in leafy green vegetables and other fiber-rich foods. If you don't like waiting in line at Sweetgreen , you can always try fiber supplements like Metamucil. There's even a supplement that explicitly targets the gay market: Pure for Men , which is made with the same psyllium husk, flaxseed and chia found in other over-the-counter fiber products, presumably manufactured extra… homosexually.
Goldstein noted that every booty is different, so you'll need to experiment to find the timing and dosage of fiber to ensure maximum cleanliness for you. For those who still insist on doing something— anything —up there before sex, Dr. Goldstein said it's best to douche using plain water and just a tiny bit of pressure from an enema bulb. But buyer beware.